Youth vs Age: a Theme for Parents
An old timer once said:
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
The enthusiasm of youth is no substitute for the efficiency of experience. As you raise your children, explore carefully the meaning of good judgment in the “youth vs age” debate.
Frankly, I’ve tried life from youth to aged perspectives, and I am appalled at my arrogance when I was young. Sixty-five years of age has compensations. One of those is better judgment.
The dilemma now faced in the workforce as Baby Boomers are replaced by less experienced workers reflects the generation gap issues faced in every family.
Parents are teachers who only get really good judgment with experience.
An example of what is faced as an inexperienced parent can be seen with new teachers.
The difficulties faced by new teachers are so severe they have a very high attrition rate. The average teacher, I’m told, leaves the field after seven years of stress and frustration. The implications of inexperience are immense.
Tell me, does this type of stress caused by inexperience plague your marriage or parent-child relationship?
An experienced teacher builds a “bag of tricks” which amount to enrichment, balance and stress-relief for everyone. Ease of learning and motivation for the learners result directly from a teacher’s experience and judgment.
Could your children or your spouse benefit from increased ease of learning and motivation to enrich your relationship?
Rather than blame them for what they lack, look at your own inexperience. As an experienced teacher, I can spend three days with a group of teens and know what their emotional, biochemical, and educational handicaps or strengths are. I can usually place them on some measure of the Myers-Briggs personality continuum.
How much do you know after living with your family members?
Would it help to know their handicaps and strengths?
I find out without going into student files “where they are now” (when they want to do their best), and focus my efforts on “the best they can be.” I have enough broad-based experienced with body language, etc. to reach these and other judgments. An inexperienced teacher lacks these tools.
An inexperienced parent also lacks essential tools for success.
Judgment and soft skills are only a few of the advantages of experience. Complex problem-solving skill is another advantage. Experience provides knowledge of pitfalls and variables which inexperience never sees or cannot prioritize if it is recognized. Mastery of complex variables is very different than recognition of them.
How does a parent get experience fast?
Practice and application of sound principles is essential. Bible biographies are a good start.
What errors and answers are there in the lives of Bible personalities?
Simulations, shadow experiences, mentoring, and case-based learning are a few assets which education can provide an inexperienced teacher. Those same ideas can be applied to parenting.
Spend time with godly seniors, exploring your own issues and hearing their answers.
Ask difficult questions. Struggle with answers. You will only regret that you did not do it sooner.
