Teaching Money Management / Crime Prevention
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When my sons were pre-teens we had a small jail visitation ministry and they saw first-hand the consequences of writing a lot of bad checks. This experience was very motivational for them, and part of training in conscientiousness (a key element, according to research, in long and healthy life).
Consider involving children early in the process of helping you write checks and balance the checkbook. A second grader can help you add and subtract. Grocery shopping is a time you can give cash for your child to pick his or her favorite fruit and vegetables. As soon as computer skills become important to your child, have them watch you with QuickBooks, then watch them as they help you enter expenses, sorting out tax items as you go.
A three or four year-old can learn how you choose what you buy at the market. Soft fruit, green fruit–teaching the gentle squeeze helps with defining what is O.K. for pet handling as well as fruit choices. Unit pricing on the shelf tags can be a learning experience for older children. As soon as children can understand what money is, they can use a dollar to find a toy at the 99-cent store.
The idea is to help them understand real world limits and luxuries. Real Consequences are essential. You don’t have the grow your own food, but you do have to afford it.
When one of my sons was five years old, he scratched his name all over the outside wooden paneling of the preschool building. I explained to him that since I could not pay a painter and had the skills, my consequence was to refinish that wall.
His consequence was to pay a fine: his weekly “donut money” (routinely given by a sweet church senior). He paid in person to the principal for three weeks.
While the principal said it wasn’t necessary, it did teach a well-remembered lesson. When he was six and bowed in a plate glass window by leaning on it, all I had to say was “WOW! Look at that window bend. If it breaks, that is A LOT of donut money.” He jumped away from the window like it was a hot griddle.
Children can remind you to set aside savings. Play “You be the parent and I’ll be the child” to test learning. Teens can help you to prioritize your spending.
You model and teach them important concepts. What is important long term that needs to be saved for? What sacrifices now will make a big difference later? They master the concepts through practice. They minister the concepts through service to you. Remember that learning needs reinforcement to become mastery. Sacrifice is part of love.
Money management concepts are crammed into one or two classroom hours of Senior Economics class in public schools. Sacrifice and love are not taught there. An economic survey course is useless when students need many hours of practice and discussion. Most of them won’t absorb enough financial vocabulary and basic ideas at school to prepare them for success in life. You are responsible for teaching money management.
Buy Ron and Judy Blue and Jeremy White’s new book: Your Kids Can Master Their Money by Tyndale House Publishers.
My book just touches the surface of what can be done to give children financial skills.
Be aware also that many states impose severe consequences on parents for their child’s misbehavior.
For example, your state may fine or jail you for letting your child participate in theft or gangs. Clearly you want to establish the kinds of bonds with your child which will prevent their need for re-parenting by gangs.
In many states you can be evicted from public housing if your child is using or selling drugs. Laws constantly change, so it is good to educate yourself on juvenile law.
Prevention of criminal behavior depends on showing your child the consequences of not following the rules. Rule-following behavior is something you teach early in life. Your three year old needs consequences every time he or she disobeys a rule. Rules need to be simple and posted in print.
I recommend a family trip to the courthouse, jail or D.A.’s office. It is very educational for all of you. Interview the D.A. Ask about common errors teens make that get them in trouble with the law. Your children will never forget a real lesson.
Check out the American Bar Association’s Division for Public Education (www.abanet.org).
Crime prevention is all about consistent consequences. One way to teach consequences is to have a mini-jail ministry.
